June 30, 2008

Another Weird Dream and Sleepless Night

My parents in their prime


I don't mean to whine, but I woke to crazy dreams again. Then I couldn't return to sleep. So I've been playing around on the computer for a couple of hours. I guess it's a good thing since I caught up on a lot of dangling issues.

I dreamt I was in high school again. In the beginning everything was great, kind of like a reunion. I hung out with my friends, marched in band, and revisited all my favorite teachers.

The dream covered what seemed to be several months of my life. Isn't it funny how some dreams go on and on yet only last a minute or so--or so the dream researchers say. Anyhow, I would go home after school every day to the home I grew up in. Oddly, I never went inside of the house.

It was a two story rock house with brown trim. It always had brown trim and any non-rock areas were painted a creamy color that matched the rock almost perfectly. In the dream, when I returned home every day, the house would be different. Either the trim would be a different color or the door would change. Even angles and gables would take on a different appearance. It was just weird.

On the last day, I was dropped off by the bus--that was the weirdest thing because I never rode the bus. My mom was walking up to the house in a bathing suit--not too odd because we had a pool. A friend of mine scampered off the bus with me and called to my mom. She turned to speak with us. She looked so young, just as she did years ago.

I stood there and never uttered a word. I just stared at my mother. My friend rattled on and on. I felt like telling her to shut up. Before I knew it mom said, "Okay" and turned back to the house. Then her appearance began to change.

My friend was pulling my arm. I pulled it away and stood watching my mother walk back to the house. Her gait began to shuffle, her back hunched over, her hair began to turn straw-like. I reached for her and screamed, "NOOO!" Then I woke up.

Why would my mind play such a dirty trick on me? It was a decent dream until the end. The last thing I want is to watch my mother age, get sickly, and die all over again. And why only a short visit with her? Where was my dad? My sister?

And what was up with my childhood home? The changes were creepy.

Thinking about it now, the dream was very isolating. I never got in the house. My family was probably in there the whole time. I really would have loved to see dad again, even for just a moment.

Oh well, it was only a dream. I shouldn't let it bother me so.
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9 comments:

  1. Ugh, this one sounds like a nightmare, Muse. Last night was a toughie for my dreams because the power went out for 5 hours and the house was hot--which brought back many memories of trying to sleep in heat--which I dreamt about!

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  2. Hi Conda! I can't stand to be hot. Trying to sleep when you're hot is even worse.

    Take care and stay cool!

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  3. Muse:

    We all have dreams but this one sounds like it's trying to tell you something. Your mother being so young. The ever changing house, and the fact that you can't go inside. And the time line - your mom was so young. Did something traumatic happen to you around that time? Maybe it was something involving the pool. Or, maybe something good happened to you. Maybe it's been buried under a pile of memories and through the dream it worked its way back up to the surface.

    I am not one of those people who think that dreams are all that telling, or significant. Normally, I think dreams are random sequences of images. But I had a dream one time that almost changed my mind on that subject.

    Interesting post.

    Happy trails.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Great story! I can sure see how that dream would creep you out and leave lots of questions.

    I woke up to a wierd one this morning. All my dead dogs were in the dream looking like they did in their "mature" state before they started their declines. Oliver, my foxhound, was in the dream too in his current young and crazy state. The only other family member who made an appearance was youngest daughter. All very strange.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey Swu!

    I think you are dead on. I won't go into details because a lot of things happened at that time--mostly good but there was some bad.

    It's too late to go change anything. I can only work from the here and now.

    Have a good one!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hello J.L.!

    Your dream was weird too. I bet you're missing some of your old pals. Probably missing home too and of course, you're worried about Oliver and how he's getting on.

    Look, I can come up with a solution for you, but Swu had to fix me.

    Take care!

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  7. Hi! This is obviously very personal and it would have been extremely hard for you to put this one out.

    It just goes to show what a caring and kindly soul you are.

    For any of us, talking to others about things that have upset us, can at times be better than bottling things up.

    I have heard of people putting pen to paper after a dream/nightmare and at times we can read too much into them, but without them where would we go at night in our sleep.

    Take Care,
    Peter

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  8. Whoa, Muse, that was a scary dream. I generally envy those who can recall their dreams enough to retell them, but maybe not this time.
    I'm sure this one has meaning. I, too, dream more often of my mother and wonder why I don't get to see more of my father.

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  9. Hey Peter!

    I try not to keep things inside. I feel so much better when I let it all hang out.

    Hi Kathy!

    Some dreams are easier for me to remember than others. I had one several years ago about my father I should post about because I'll never forget it.

    I wish I would dream more about my dad. I really miss him.

    I hope you both have a wonderful day!

    ReplyDelete

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